Settled

It’s been 4 months since I wrote. You’d think I’d have more than enough time during this pandemic, but NOOOO. I fill my days with work and family. I have not made writing a priority. Ugh. That changes NOW.

I have to tell you about something I recently experienced. A friend of mine started a new retreat business. Of course the pandemic didn’t help her biz grow, but she did have her first retreat last weekend and I had the pleasure of attending. It was so restorative. Amongst many months of isolating and being careful, it was nice to practice a little external (out-of-the-house) self-care. Have I mentioned my hair is ridiculously long?

Let me set the scene, she rented a beautiful beach house for the retreat. The day began with coffee and pastries. Then it was craft time.! We made fun tassel necklaces. Mid-craft, we moseyed on over to the couch for getting-to-know-you Jenga. Each block we pulled had a fun question to answer. There were only 5 of us and some of us knew each other, but she asked great questions like, “Do you have a hidden talent?”. It was so much fun. During this time, my friend was setting up lunch. Lunch was catered and delish. Afterward, it was quiet time. We were able to retreat to a closet cubby, porch or bedroom to journal (which she provided), rest, pray, and restore. She had thoughtfully placed inspiring messages all over the house. I needed this time.

Then came the massages. Oh yes, I said MASSAGES. She had hired a masseuse! It was lovely. Following this, we finished our craft with some dessert, coffee and a champagne toast. The whole day was just…no words. I hope you all are being kind to yourself during this time.

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hunker down

So we have battled the stores, bought our toilet paper, canned goods, snacks, boxed beverages and waived goodbye to civilization…for now. I call our stash our “apocalypse food”. Not funny, but doesn’t it kinda feel that way? To see schools closing, events cancelled, people scared, it’s a lot.

We’re doing our part: keeping to ourselves, our neighborhood and staying put. It’s something we all long for, staying home, vegging out, until someone tells you that you HAVE to do it. You HAVE to stay home. We’ve all seen The Shining, right?

Here’s to rationing our toilet paper and watching Netflix until we lose our minds from cabin fever. Praying we can all find the beauty and gratitude of the simple life.

Sunday Funday

Sunday in my household is usually watching church online (love and miss my old church dearly) and then chores, maybe a nap, but mostly relaxing and attempting to observe the sabbath.

As I type this, I’m watching my toddler on the baby monitor fight his nap time. We recently transitioned to a big boy bed and life has not been the same. We wake up every morning to find a toddler sleeping on the floor next to his baby gate at the entryway of his room. We fought it at first. We thought that discipling him into bed would work. But then we invited some friends over who have a 13 and 3 year old and they imparted some wisdom. They said, “Who cares. He’ll figure out eventually that sleeping in his bed is better than the floor.”

Duh. Why didn’t I think of that? Him sleeping on the floor didn’t do any harm. Ultimately, I just wanted him to be safe and sound in his bed and basically listen to ME. Ugh. How this lesson can be applied to a lot in our lives. We fight and fight and fight and ultimately, surrendering is the better route to take. Also, God has enormous patience with us. How he probably longs to see us safe and sound in our beds but instead we push back and do whatever it is we want to do. The hope is that we all eventually figure it out. That we find our true comfort in Him rather than in our own ways.

Time for a nap.

swift season

Life has gotten a little nutty. Not in a bad way, but in a I don’t have a lot of time kind of way. I’m back working full-time (praise the Lord). I am truly enjoying it. Getting back to it has been challenging. Making time for the important things is imperative. My current daily morning routine involves waking up before the boys, reading my daily devo, A Moment to Breathe (which I’m loving), short workout, meditation/prayer (from Abide app), breakfast, shower/get ready for work. Although I work from home (such a blessing), I still get ready as if I was going into the office. I am frequently video conferencing and need to maintain a professional appearance. My days vary with tasks/chores/work, but for the past month I’ve protected 1 day a week, Sunday. I can’t say it’s a true Sabbath, but I am committed to not work on that day. As a result of this sabbath, God has shown me true grace and strength throughout the week. The endurance He provides me feels supernatural at times. So cool to be reminded of His greatness and to remember that He’s so much bigger than me and my circumstances. This Christmas season has flown in fast and I just hope for all of us to be able to take pause and reflect on what God is doing in our lives. Much love and Merry Christmas!

J&J

Thursday morning. Watching/listening to Julie & Julia as a click away at my work. This movie reminds me of this blog that I started several years ago during the onset of my fertility journey. It helps me to release the day-to-day nuttiness of this world. It allows me to connect with all of you. To relate and be relatable.

This movie also reminds me of my love of cookbooks. I collect them. I decorate with them. I also work my way through them as Julie does in this movie. I don’t do every recipe, but I do start at the beginning. I cook the ones that appeal to me and my family. I save the ones that are successful. The criteria for successful is whether or not I would want to eat and make it again. I have a pinterest board of my confirmed delish recipes here. These are my craves and favs.

I hope you all have a wonderful rest of your week. Remember to take the time to find inspiration and connect with those that you love.

Worth & Work

I’ve been wanting to tackle this subject for a while because I have put so much of my worth in my work. Recent events finally gave me the motivation to pull the trigger on this topic.

Yesterday, a lot of people I know were laid off. I’m so sad for them and for the company. They lost so many valuable people, but unfortunately, this is the corporate way.

Which brings me to the point of this post. I recently read a devotion about finding our worth in our work. I have struggled with this in the past and although I’m not healed, I am working on it. The author spoke of moving to a new town and leaving behind her career/job that had given her “a tremendous sense of importance and influence.” Her established history, reputation and authority had become a comfortable companion. Can you relate to this? I definitely can.

She goes on to say that although there’s nothing wrong with the above, it’s the pride that can become the “stumbling block” or an “idol” to us. When we look for our significance in a job, we can become complacent and struggle to move forward. To move forward in being pruned and molded by Our Creator. He has the best plan for us. Our plans will ALWAYS pale in comparison to His bigger purpose for our life and our life is not defined by our work on this earth.

When I lost my 9-5 job in April, I felt like a complete failure. I knew it wasn’t true, but my emotional and prideful sides took over and convinced me that I had failed. I didn’t have worth now that I was out of work. What am I going to do now? God surprised me. He’s still surprising me…

 

freedom@40

I turn 40 years old today. I started the day with a lapse in memory which made me feel old and resulted in tears. Can you tell I’m struggling with this birthday?

I’ve been slacking on blogging lately. I’ve been super busy on the work front, which is a total blessing. But—I want to be sure I don’t lose what has helped heal me. God has a lot in store for me and I am grateful for this time I’ve had with my family. It’s been hard financially, but we’ve had amazing support from family and friends.

The number 40 is teaching me is that I’m free to be who I am. Free of the fake and phony. Free of all the falsehood that’s in this world. I plan on cherishing this year for what it is.

Anniversary

I took about a week and a half off from writing. I’ve missed it. It’s been a busy time. Lots of work (thanking God for that!) and life happening.

Today is my 8th wedding anniversary. Eight years with my best friend. He’s the best and today I had the best day with him. His mom (nana) came to watch the tater tot while we went out to lunch and a movie. It was awesome. We had the restaurant to ourselves and an amazing waiter. The food was unreal to the point that I wanted to unbutton in the booth so I could keep eating. Then we saw Ad Astra. Very good. I really wasn’t sure what to expect but I really liked it. An astrological drama. Highly recommend.

This time last year, I was in deep grief. So much so, my husband was taking me to a psychiatrist on our anniversary. I was grieving our move. Moving away from my family, friends, home, job. It was a tough time. It’s incredible how much can change in a year.

Thank you God for your daily renewal and letting us see Your light through the dark times.

hubs hand-drawn anniversary card to me ❤

Fall in Love

How do you celebrate the beginning of autumn? We hung our fall garden flag and updated our welcome mat. I’m also looking forward to more pumpkin everything.

Today we kept our slider open with the fans blasting and it was comfortable in the house! Definite change in climate. Usually it’s unbearably hot here. The evenings are breezy and slightly on the cool side. Perfect walking weather.

Time to let go. Let all the bad fall away and leave the good. Happy Fall my friends!

Berry Choco Muffins

Today was a good day. My girlfriend and I went to look at a house built in 1900! It was a mess, but a beautiful one. So much potential and overall MAGICAL. It’s in the uptown area of our historic city. Plus my friend is a creative genius so it would be transformed and given all the love it needs.

Afterward, we went to a little market and had lemonade and quiche. She has 2 kiddos and is well versed in needing non-mommy time. I accidentally invited my hubs and son to join us at the market and she reminded me that it was “Girl Time”. I was grateful that she helped me protect that time. I’m not so good at that.

Let’s keep the good going…

Stuff

• 1½ cups flour
• ½ cup white sugar
• ¼ cup coconut sugar
• 2 tsp. baking powder
• ½ tsp. cinnamon
• ½ tsp. salt
• ½ cup almond milk
• ⅓ cup vegetable oil
• ½ tsp. vanilla extract
• 1 egg
• 1 cup chopped strawberries
• 3/4 cup chocolate chips
• Sparkling Sugar

Steps

• Preheat oven to 375º F. Line muffin pan with paper liners.
• In a large bowl, combine flour (1.5 c), white sugar (1/2 c), coconut sugar (1/4 c), baking powder (2 tsp), cinnamon (1/2 tsp) and salt (1/2 tsp).
• In a separate bowl, add almond milk (1/2 c), vegetable oil (1/3 c), vanilla (1/2 tsp) and 1 egg. Pour into flour mixture.
• Add in strawberries (1 c) & chocolate chips (3/4 c) and mix until just combined.
• Fill each muffin cup ¾ full. Sprinkle sparkling sugar (as much as you like!) on top of muffins.
• Bake for 22 minutes, or until done.

Inspired by: https://sugarspiceandfamilylife.com/2017/03/strawberry-muffins-recipe.html/amp