Today I had my pre-op appointment for our second IVF transfer. Doc came in and did the probing. He had another doc shadowing him. Nothing like a party around your who-ha. As he’s doing the exam, he mentions my fibroid.We have been moving forward with this transfer instead of pursuing surgery. We were hopeful and relieved, but after today, I’m discouraged and wondering if we’re doing the right thing. I’ve been banking on this working. I wasn’t going to try and protect myself and not get my hopes up. I did that last time. Why should I do that again? I know what grief feels like, but today left me feeling like I’m going to be heartbroken again. Doc was not encouraging at all, but we are proceeding with the transfer. We need a miracle. I know this. Conceiving is a miracle in itself – IVF or not. I shared all these feelings with the hubs and as usual, he talked me down. Thank the Lord for him.

As my sweet friend, Kari reminds me, “Proclaim it in the name of Jesus!” Well as troubled as today left me, I’m here proclaiming that this is going to work and surrendering it Him.

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